Tag Archives: Bihar

Nitish Kumar: Only 32% students passing the board exams shows how govt has acted against cheating

A day after the results of Bihar’s plus two examination were announced in which 64 percent of students failed, agitated examinees on Wednesday protested outside the Council office in Patna against poor pass percentage.

Chief Minister Nitish Kumar Demands Special Category Status For Bihar

A large number of students gathered outside the Inter Council office to protest unsatisfactory results. A few of them also tried to climb the main gate but were prevented by police.

But Nitish Kumar is unfazed by the poor results. In fact he has been portraying it in a positive way.  According to Nitish, the poor board results mean that government has been able to stop cheating on a large scale which is good for the future. Students were not able to cheat in the exams and that’s the reason they failed.

 

Tejashwi Yadav: Just give me 5 days more to study what EVM is and then I will shift my focus to ‘Wannacry’

Close on the heels of a series of exposes by Bihar Bhartiya Janata Party (BJP) leader Sushil Kumar Modi against Rashtriya Janata Dal (RJD) chief Lalu Prasad Yadav, fresh details have emerged linking his younger son and Bihar Deputy Chief Minister Tejashwi Yadav to an alleged shell company AB Export through which he got a posh property in Delhi’s New Friends Colony.

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But that’s not what all is on Tejashwi’s plate. With the AAP allegation over the EVM tampering and other high profile scandals and news, he has to keep himself up to date with latest happenings. Currently he is in the process of understanding the term ‘EVM’ as he had never heard of that term before. He realized that he should learn about the term only when some journalists asked him about EVMs and he was not able to respond.

Yesterday when one of our reporters asked him if he had details about ‘wannacry’, Tejashwi ji said that currently he is in the process of learning about EVMs and it would be helpful for the citizens of Bihar. He has asked for 5 days’ time after which he surely will lokk into other matters one of which obviously is the ‘Wannacry’ virus attack.

‘Firauti Gangs’ will not be eligible for Bihar start-up funds: Nitish Kumar

Chief Minister Nitish Kumar on Tuesday released Bihar StartUp Policy 2017 and allocated Rs. 500 Crs for the startup fund. Even before the curious members attending the seminar raised any questions,

Nitish made it clear that Kidnapping gangs will not be considered as startups.

nitish-kumar-startup-bihar

Even though Bihar Govt. has proactively taken steps to promote entrepreneurship, the only industry still providing guaranteed return on investments is the kidnapping industry. Every day new gangs come up in the industry and try to capture the market share from the existing Kidnappers. They have always being vocal in asking the govt to do something for budding kidnappers. Kidnapping gangs employ thousands of unemployed youth in Bihar and if it has to be run professionally government should provide them incentives.

Our Faking News reporter spoke to Mr. Siddharth Singh who recently launched his online kidnapping app named ‘KYT (kidnap your target)’, and he had this to say,” Our operating costs are increasing day by day, as customers who want us to kidnap someone have long payment cycles, but we have to pay salary to our workers(kidnappers). If government will not think about us, the industry will collapse. All we want is some interest free loan, and cooperation from the local police, to run our business profitably”

But Nitish Kumar is not the one to give in to such demands. He has made it absolutely clear that any Kidnapper approaching the government for help will be kidnapped arrested  by the police. He also said that Bihar government would welcome any anti-kidnapping startups which will help people live safely in Bihar and at the same time will give a tough time to the Kidnapping industry.

Well, it has to be seen how the 500 Crs is going to be used up and which startups are going to use it, but one things for sure Bihar government has given a tight slap on the face of the kidnapping industry

Bihari man caught traveling in toilet, even though he was having confirm ticket

Indian railway is the lifeline of major population across the country. lacs and crores of people take the train on a daily basis. But getting a confirmed ticket is still out of the reach for many. In fact very few get it. Some through agents, some by standing in long queues outside the ticket counters.

Bihar funfunnykhez

But the case is different in Bihar. Most of the trains are full upto the brim and people do have to travel inside toilets and near the doors. In fact there is a craze among people to find the toilet seat on a first-cum-first-serve basis.

Travelling in toilets is a matter of pride in some parts of India. Government is even mulling over the idea to charge a premium from people getting an opportunity to travel inside the toilets. Recently our journalist came to know of a scenario where a person who was having a confirmed ticket was travelling inside the toilet. People had to forcefully take him out of the toilet and transfer him to his seat.

Well to report such instances, do mail us at editor@funfunnykhez.com

Tejashvi Yadav gives a full speech on intolerance when asked about Demonetization

Education gives you the power to reach unparalleled heights. But not in Bihar. Tejashvi yadav, the son of Mr. lalu Prasad Yadav is the deputy chief minister, even though he has only studied up to 12th standard.

tejashvi yadav in a catch 22 situation
tejashvi yadav in a catch 22 situation

 

Tejashvi Yadav was very vocal about growing intolerance in the country and had learnt the word ‘intolerance’ in some 13 days. But once he learned it, he has not stopped using it at different press conferences and meetings.

He is very fond of the word, so recently when he was asked about demonetization, he thought it is the synonym of intolerance so he went on and on talking about growing intolerance. His speech went on for 50 minutes and even people in Bihar thought demonetization is equal to intolerance.

It was only later when a media person explained him about the difference, that Tejashvi promised to learn about the new word and return back in 7-8 days.

 

@SantaMentalist

Kanpur youth stands in wrong queue for 2 hours; the queue was for people buying Gutkha

With so many people exchanging notes and crowding outside ATMs, its difficult to judge which queue is for what purpose. Already there were umpteen queues in our country and the recent decision of the government has increased the number of queues many fold.

Gutkha queues are as long as the ATM queues
Gutkha queues are as long as the ATM queues

 

A strange incident happened in Kanpur. A guy named Sanil who was in his early 30s was standing in a queue for 2 hours to exchange his old notes, only to found out later that that queue was for people buying Gutkha at a pan wala counter.

Sanil wasted his precious 2 hours and felt really helpless, but then he bought Gutkha and relaxed his mind. many similar incidents are happening across U.P and Bihar where you have regular queues at the pan counters, and people are standing in those queues thinking that the counters are for dispensing money which they require urgently.

Government should have clear cut sign boards made out to help public in this distress.Otherwise people will keep on wasting time in the wrong queue.

 

@SantaMentalist

 

Bihar police shoots Pizza delivery boy in encounter; says he was running away from jail without delivering extra oregano pouches

The M.P police encounter in which 8 SIMI activists died has created havoc in the country. Top officials are claiming the encounter to be a fake one where police is trying to pat its own back.

fake encounter on a rise
‘fake encounter on a rise’

 

Police of all states are now trying to hog the limelight by creating such encounter scenarios. Jharkhand police in fact shot 5 people who were running in a running race, claiming that they were hard core criminals.

Bihar police is not far off. Recently the central jail superintendent had ordered Pizza from a well known outlet. The Pizza was delivered but the delivery guy dint give away enough oregano pouches which made the jail officials angry.

The special team of 3 encounter specialists chased the boy down, shot him and circulated a video showing the encounter. Afterwards, the police labelled him as an accused in some anti social activities and patted its own back. More and more such incidents of fake encounters are coming in from various states and we will try to bring you some more interesting cases.

 

@SantaMentalist

 

Nitish Kumar : We will stop black marketing of question paper leak, will put them on Flipkart

Bihar government is facing the wrath of the nation after constantly failing to tackle the question paper leak menace. Recently some toppers were caught with degrees which were fake, they dint even know the subjects they were appearing for.

Nitish Kumar launching his dream project
‘Nitish Kumar launching his dream project’

Most of the rich students in Bihar get the question papers 2-3 days prior to the examinations. The poor students are the ones who suffer as they can’t cough up the premium to be paid for such question papers as there are limited question papers which are auctioned and the rich students lay their hands first.

Nitish Kumar is willing to help the poor students. His government is formulating a plan by which all papers will be put on Flipkart from where students can buy it at an affordable price.

The price will be fixed according to the toughness of the paper. No student will get the privilege to buy it before 2-3 days of the exams as it used to happen earlier.

There will be no limits in the amount of question papers sold. Every student who wants to buy a question paper will get a question paper.

@SantaMentalist